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Minas Tirith Forums » The Prancing Pony Archive » The Ninja Otherhood
Author Topic: The Ninja Otherhood
Luke
Guard of the Citadel
Citizen # 5836
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The basic VIBRATION you should be getting right about now is one where 90% of your body is quivering in your boots from one end of the room to the other, and the other 10% quickly follows.

*Kickes feet out from under a blubberous Noshgugglier, rips his jaws out and bottles them for his collection.

Excuse me, I just had to teach that pest a lesson while he was trying to show me how a ninja would fit in his mouth in no less than no easy steps. But, little did he know that I, as a ninja, am the barrer of a prophetic mole that grows on my face somewhere under my mask, in a location of that blackness which is called: Behindmysuit.

Wondering why this thread was started? I thought that it could be somewhere for Ninjas to collect themselves. I know, I know, Ninjas are experts at being reclusive on their own, but here we can be all of that together.
But I have something to say to my Ninja comrades out there (or in there--you know how clever and sneaky we can be). I, being a Ninja, already know where all of you are at this exact second, so it won't do you any good to not post!
And, I know all of the Ninja hidding places as well--so don't even start fishing for all of your missing staffs because I've got them. And if you fish with fishing-hooks I'll take your hooks and twist them into a long spear before they can even reach my finger tips. That's right, that's how fast I can tie them--so fast that my finger tips aren't even touching them!!!

Anyway, this is an invite to the Ninja Otherhood. Why Otherhood? Because I wanted it to sound mysterious and new--like climbing out of the hairy armpit of a slithering Snakeorilla beast! Actually, that wouldn't be new to me--I've actually done that many times before, and killed the beast more than once on more than one occation.

Don't try and run from a Ninja like me, or you'll find that I've snuck up to you so fast and so closely, that there will be two people wearing your belt! And one of them will be dead soon after.

[ 04-17-2007, 05:41 PM: Message edited by: Luke ]

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Roll of Honor Mahanaxar
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Citizen # 1540

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Pirates > Ninjas

That's right, I said it.

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Luke
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Citizen # 5836
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*Decapitates ogre with scissor kick.
*Replaces missing head with a black surrender flag on a ten-foot pole.

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Luke
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I've already found a score of two Ninjas who were trying to hide from me, and now they are black leather sofas. Don't you be next!
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Artaresto
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Citizen # 6089

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Am I a ninja? If I am you should know []
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Belthronding
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Citizen # 5113
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No, No, No. You're a Jedi not a Ninja.
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Roll of Honor Mahanaxar
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Pirates are also > Jedi.
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Artaresto
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I am a Jedi []

[]

May the force be with me []

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Roll of Honor Mahanaxar
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Are you allowed to say it to yourself like that? I always thought it was sort of an Episcopal blessing or something.

"May the force be with you."

"And also with you."

[]

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Luke
Guard of the Citadel
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Artaresto, this is not accually your Ninja name, otherwise you would have never broadcast it. And if you do broadcast it...let me explain it in two simple words: EVERYONE IN YOUR GENERAL VICINITY WITH A WORKING PAIR OF ITS (IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT "IT" IS--IT COULD BE A PAIR OF EARS, EYES, TONGUES, HORNS, WATCHES, ETC.) WILL FIND THAT THEY DON'T WORK ANY MORE.

A white ninja (blast them to heck!) has inflicted amnesia upon you. Amnesia that is powerfull enough to make any normal, wimp-collar person wake up in the middle of a cat-fight on the back of a helio-serpent in the nostril of a firebreathing minotaur--what was I saying? Oh yes! Any amnesia that strong can only come from a white, lower case n, ninja. Unfortuanately your memory has been locked away in a tower inside his brain.

*Bashes white ninja's head in and hands it to his comrade.

Believe it or not, if you eat his brain it will make you smarter.

[ 04-17-2007, 06:11 PM: Message edited by: Luke ]

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Artaresto
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*ate his brain*
*feels slightly smarter*

Maha , I'm a Jedi, so I can state it to myself [] . Or at least I like to believe that []

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LyraLuthien Tinuviel
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Citizen # 5173

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Luke, you should have posted this thread as MANDOS.
Luke is too sane a sock-puppet to get away with this kind of blibberish.

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Luke
Guard of the Citadel
Citizen # 5836
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Trust me Lyra, once you put on the Ninja mask you instantly have all Ninja Knowledge.
But, if you try to apply the mask to your own face without knowing how to do it, than it gets sucked into your nasal cavities and you resemble a fish out of water--and not even an ocean of water can save you then.

*Punches a hole through a mountain troll.

Would anyone like a troll hole, or would you prefer to just eat the whole troll?
Or does troll just sit in your stomach?

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Luke
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I've killed that troll repeatedly on more than one occation. So it won't come to life again while your eating it. It might come to life AFTER you eat it though, so don't swallow the head while it's still got horns on it.

The only defence against this is to train your stomach to use a Katana. Sword eaters have tried this, but then they die.

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Roll of Honor Mahanaxar
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Wait... so Luke = MANDOS? That makes a lot of sense.
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Roll of Honor Athene
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Unless he's Wetty. []

Of course, there's a distinct possibility that Wetty is MANDOS.
[]

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Roll of Honor Mahanaxar
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Maybe I'm MANDOS! One can never be too sure.
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Luke
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A Ninja never reveals himself or itself. But there is a possibility that a Ninja can be two or more people--it all depends on who they are killing that day.

Maha is probably in a branch of Ninja that is so inside the in of Ninjaness that he is playing both sides. Only really advanced Ninjas can be two people AND kill themselves repeatedly.

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Luke
Guard of the Citadel
Citizen # 5836
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Maha gets the Ninja award for being Mandos and himself. A double whammy.
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