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Minas Tirith Forums » The Ivy Bush » middle earth pick up lines (Page 9)
Author Topic: middle earth pick up lines
the lost king
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Ondo It is funny. Remember its all in good fun. Came you come up with any comedy that doesn't poke fun at someone. There is no such thing. It isn't disrespectful if any thing its the opposite. It creative minds at work. And so what if it isn't constructive it is fun. And thats a good thing. And stop using fancy words trying to impress us. I understand what your saying I just think your taking whats said here way too seriously. RELAX!!!
From: Lameham MD | Registered: Dec 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
the lost king
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Wow 6 days since anyone posted. I hope I didn't kill the thread.
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ShireStrider
Soldier of Gondor
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From the Return of the King...with apologies to Prof. Tolkien:

Pippin to Bergil:
"....we know some wrestling tricks in my little country. Where, let me tell you, I am considered uncommonly large and strong.."

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Elanor Gamgee
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Treebeard to Pippin and Merry:
"I am not very...hmmmmmm......bendable"
*is wholly in favour of a bit of decontextuality

[ 02-04-2004, 10:35 AM: Message edited by: Elanor Gamgee ]

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Sírëlen
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I second that, Elanor!

Sam to Frodo:
Mr. Frodo, you look tired. You should get some rest while the getting is good, if you take my meaning.
Frodo: Alright Sam. For a few hours. But then I'll get up and take my turn at watching.
Sam looks at Frodo, and suddenly a B101 oldies song kicks in.
*Put your head on my shoulder...*
Frodo:..Oh Sam!


Frodo pulls Sam on the Elven boat along the falls of Rauros.
Sam: I made a promise, Mr. Frodo, A promise! Don't you leave him Samwise Gamgee! And I don't mean to...I don't mean to.
Frodo looks at him with a sudden feverish lust.
Frodo: Then don't leave me Sam! Take me! Take me now!
Sam: Mr. Frodo?
Frodo: (Snapping back into reality) Forgive me Sam. I don't know what has gotten into me!

Sam: I know what it is. It's the ring. It's getting..
Frodo: Hornier. uh.. (looks up in a rush) Heavier I mean..heavier!
Sam: Yeah...uh...
Frodo: (Stares blankly) Let's go..
They turn and start paddling toward the Eastern Shore.

[ 02-10-2004, 07:24 AM: Message edited by: Sírëlen ]

-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-
"Twas in the darkest depths of Mordor, I met a girl so fair. But Gollum and the evil one crept up and slipped away with her, yeah." - Led Zeppelin 'Ramble On'

From: The tiniest, puniest, wateriest state in America. Figure it out.. | Registered: Jan 2004  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Snöwdog
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Aragorn to Eowyn as he pulls out his sword...

"Its longer and stronger than it used to be..."

From: In the Shadows of Annuminas | Registered: Aug 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Roll of Honor The Woodwose
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From The Hobbit:

I don't suppose the magic is strong enough to hurt you, if you just touch a bit of wet...

"Steady!" said Bilbo, "you have thrown it right into the wood on the other side now. Draw it back carefully.

"That was a good pull, my lads; and a good job that our rope was the stronger."

Bilbo: Half a moment. I gave you a good long chance just now.
Gollum: It must make haste, haste!
Bilbo: Ugh! It is cold and clammy!


My favorite:

What have I got in my pocket? []

Edit: A couple more:

"I will give you a name, and I shall call you Sting!"

"Go on! Go on! I will do the stinging!"


[ 10-25-2004, 06:52 PM: Message edited by: The Woodwose ]

From: I'm a wose darn it! I live in the WOODS!!! | Registered: Mar 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Jango
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[] [] []
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Roll of Honor The Woodwose
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Bilbo: I have always understood that dragons were softer underneath, esecially in the region of the -- er -- chest;

[ 01-30-2005, 12:17 PM: Message edited by: The Woodwose ]

From: I'm a wose darn it! I live in the WOODS!!! | Registered: Mar 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Tar-Aldarion
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the ladies in the shire to pippin and merry

ohhh....i that something else has grown too......!!
(wonder what they mean ehemm..)

-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-
For the less even as for the greater there is some deed that he may accomplish but once only; and in that deed his heart shall rest.

— Fëanor, from the Quenta Silmarillion.

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Snöwdog
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Gondorian maidens gossiping and giggling as Boromir walks by:

[i]OOoohhhh... I wanna blow his horn!

-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-
"I don't know half of you half as well as I should like; and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve."
- Bilbo Baggins

"These Lord of the Rings movies must be taken deep into Mordor and cast back into the fiery chasm from whence they came."

Middle Earth Angling Guide

Avatar: Shadow Ranger
Artwork by Jonathon Earl Bowser

From: In the Shadows of Annuminas | Registered: Aug 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Joe Stupid KingofBelfalas
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Random Woman: They don't call him wormtongue for nothing!
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Snöwdog
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Rosie Cotton to Samwise when he got back....

[] "Lets make Hobbits!" []

[ 03-29-2007, 01:56 AM: Message edited by: Snöwdog ]

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Roll of Honor Freya
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[] @ Swifty's 4.5 year old joke on page 1 (though also works if Sam says it to Frodo....as well as appealing to certain thematic subtexts)
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Lord Glorfindel
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Snowdog... []

-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-
Official God Father Of Lentil
"LG for PM!!!" - CloudStrife
"LG = Lifes Good = Lifes Glorfindel" - Cloudstife (él es mi amigo!)
"LG, you're evil. Just plain evil" - Aermir
"I REALLY must get around to terminating your account LG!" -Wetwang
"You mad blighter" - Gloin the Dark

From: I grew up in Europe, where History is from. | Registered: Jan 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Captain of Gondor
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You got a very sick mind Snowdog. [] lol.
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Roll of Honor Snowman of Forochel
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That's why Elora loves him. []
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Roll of Honor Adulithien
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quote:
"Lets make Hobbits!"
The whole let's-make-a-baby thing has always conjured a funny image in my mind. I used to want to make a short film involving 50's kitch cinematography/music and "Bisquick Baby Mix." It would involve a shot of June Cleaver putting the mix in the oven, smiling as she sets a timer, and then a cut to her pulling a pan out of the oven with a baby in it. []

[ 04-03-2007, 11:17 PM: Message edited by: Adulithien ]

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Snöwdog
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quote:
The whole let's-make-a-baby thing has always conjured a funny image in my mind. I used to want to make a short film involving 50's kitch cinematography/music and "Bisquick Baby Mix." It would involve a shot of June Cleaver putting the mix in the oven, smiling as she sets a timer, and then a cut to her pulling a pan out of the oven with a baby in it.
[]

"What did June say to Ward while making breakfast?"
"Ward, you suuuure were hard on the beav last night!"
quote:
You got a very sick mind Snowdog. [] lol.
Lessee....Sam gets home and marries Rosie, and they had how many hobbit lads and lasses hmmmm??? []

Back on topic...

Eowyn to Faramir in the house of healing...

"Is it twue what they say about the sons of the line of Hurin?"
*zzzzzzzzzzzzzzp*
"Its twue! Its weally weally twue! Mmmmmm....


(excuse my ripping off both Revenge of the Nerds & Blazing Saddles in this post)
[] [] [] []

From: In the Shadows of Annuminas | Registered: Aug 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Captain of Gondor
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While we are on this subject.

Orcs when they find a mate:

"Let me make you cry with my unusual torture."

Edit: A few more.

Gimli: It's true you never see many dwarf women. That's because they're always busy. With certain things. Eowyn in reply: What? You make them work all day and night on thier house chores, never allowing them a break? You chavinist pigs.

(forgive me, I don't remember how you spell chavinist)

[ 04-06-2007, 09:11 AM: Message edited by: Captain of Gondor ]

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Miranthridel Bloom
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quote:
Legolas: Did you know that the elvish language is 80% humming?
*chokes*
Should really re-read this thread more often.

From: HMAS Fire & Ice, Miranistan | Registered: Jan 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Roll of Honor Lillianna
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a couple of if-you-know-what-I-mean's....

Gimli to Galadriel: "I hear these Lothlorien arrows never miss a target....if you know what I mean" []
Celeborn (upon overhearing): "....well....actually..."

Arwen to Aragorn: "I really know how to re-forge those swords...if you know what I mean" []

Aragorn to Arwen: "You really get my Anduin risin'...if you know what I mean!" []

Rosie to Sam: "My pool's leaf-trap is needing some cleaning....if you know what I mean." []

Random Bree person to another: "I hear there's room for one more in that Green Dragon of yours...if you know what I mean" []

[ 04-10-2007, 06:45 PM: Message edited by: Lillianna ]

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Snöwdog
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quote:
Random Bree person to another: "I hear there's room for one more in that Green Dragon of yours...if you know what I mean" []
Did you mean "Random Bree guy to top Bree prostitute:' ??? []
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Roll of Honor Lillianna
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I was trying to be more inclusive to the general population of Bree, thank you very much.
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Snöwdog
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[] []
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