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Minas Tirith Forums » The Golden Perch » Alcohol + Poetry = Uh oh!
Author Topic: Alcohol + Poetry = Uh oh!
HT
Soldier of Gondor
Citizen # 282
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I wasn't drunk when I wrote this, but I sure wish I could say I was... when it began, it was supposed to be an Ode to Spring. That sentiment lasted about two lines.

Ode To Spring

I think Spring is really nice,
For, you see, the melting ice
Always drowns a lot of mice.
That's why I like Spring.

Other reasons for my joy
Are the rainstorms. Boy oh boy!
Thunder and lightning can destroy.
That's why I like Spring.

If you do not share my views
Then I will get tanked on booze
And stab you till your blood does ooze
'Cause you don't like Spring.

But I'd hate to go that far
Because true-blue friends we are.
Also, I would hate to mar
The beauty of the Spring.

I hope Spring brings you as well
More happiness than words can tell.
Else, I'll send you straight to Hell
Where they don't HAVE Spring.

P.S. I would never perform senseless brutal acts of violence like the one mentioned in the preceding poem. Like so much writing, it is there merely for effect. What a nutball, you're supposed to think. The protagonist in the poem IS quite a nutball, I wrote it that way. I wrote one to Summer, Fall, and a little-known season I like to call Squishblop, but if you thought Ode To Spring was off-putting, whoa golly!!

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Vala he is, thou saist? Get thee gone, thou gore-crow of Mandos! Etc.


From: Cambridge, ON | Registered: Feb 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Miturian
Guard of the Citadel
Citizen # 139
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It's god, and kind'a fun

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If you haven't been at the buttom,
and climbed all the way op,
then you don't know what you're standing on.


From: Århus, Denmark | Registered: Oct 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Lady Eowyn of Ithilien
Guard of the Citadel
Citizen # 207

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That's a cute poem

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Mens sana in corpore sano.


From: VA | Registered: Feb 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Beren
Guard of the Citadel
Citizen # 38
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Stagger stagger stagger,
Roll, crawl crawl crawl.
In a daze I take out my dagger
and I throw it at the wall

Guzzle guzzle guzzle,
burp burp burpity.
I really have had it
with self-righteous hypocracy

piss piss piss
felt good to drain my tank
the whore just gave me a kiss
and a cute little butt spank

drink drink drink,
talk talk talk.
why make a stink?
I will just take a walk


From: Northwest USA | Registered: Aug 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
ZENITH
Guard of the Citadel
Citizen # 400

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very cute very cute!!!!!!!!!
I need the old ale before I begin to spout poetry

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how do you Know you are alive unless you have died?


From: The Mens Room. ENGLAND | Registered: Mar 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Snöwdog
Guard of the Citadel
Citizen # 15

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Schoon schoon schoon your brew
gently down the throat
take the babe home and
wake up with a goat

-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-
"I don't know half of you half as well as I should like; and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve."
- Bilbo Baggins

"These Lord of the Rings movies must be taken deep into Mordor and cast back into the fiery chasm from whence they came."

Middle Earth Angling Guide

Avatar: Shadow Ranger
Artwork by Jonathon Earl Bowser

From: In the Shadows of Annuminas | Registered: Aug 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Roll of Honor Thorongil
Guard of the Citadel
Citizen # 792

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Alright Snowdog, did you get fired or something? I've noticed quite a rash of random threads on a variety of topics that seem to have been resurfaced by you, after being dead for a number of years... what's the deal, yo? [] []

-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-
If you've come for a visit, you'd be welcome with fewer, if you've come to take me away, you'll need a lot more.
I'm a denizen. Athene said so.

From: San Antonio, TX | Registered: Aug 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
HT
Soldier of Gondor
Citizen # 282
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Three years later, not much has changed. Spring is still nice, and Squishblop is not well known.
From: Cambridge, ON | Registered: Feb 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Roll of Honor Lugbúrz
Guard of the Citadel
Citizen # 867

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Come now, let's have the other three. You know you want to spill it, and you know we're waiting to hear it.
From: Middangeard | Registered: Sep 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Roll of Honor Varnafindë
Guard of the Citadel
Citizen # 4097

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quote:
and Squishblop is not well known.
Is it the short season just before Spring?
It sounds like the sound which the snow is making during that time.

From: Narnia, also connected with Norway | Registered: Dec 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Snöwdog
Guard of the Citadel
Citizen # 15

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quote:
Alright Snowdog, did you get fired or something? I've noticed quite a rash of random threads on a variety of topics that seem to have been resurfaced by you, after being dead for a number of years... what's the deal, yo?
Its what happens when you fire mortar rounds into the dungeon. []

I was out camping once when we drank several beers and burning all kinds of things, and I threw into the campfire this huge wet log (it was definitely a drunken log-in) and thee was a carpenter ant nest in it.. was fun watching them scrambling out their little smoking holes and falling into the flames to explode their boiling guts all over the place.

From: In the Shadows of Annuminas | Registered: Aug 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
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