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Minas Tirith Forums » The Green Dragon » A Short Tale - A Word Aside (Page 16)
Author Topic: A Short Tale - A Word Aside
Inc'
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What now ? []
From: Yoshi's Island | Registered: Apr 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Q
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Start up a new sentence, what else? The company of scholars didn't have to have such great skills in order to survive in an Inn...thus they survived by the extreme opposite: passiveness.
From: LOS ANGELES, CA. | Registered: Dec 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Thingol of Doriath
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No, I think we ignore Q's ridiculous word once again.

You know Q- you get irritated when people hijack your thread in the Pony. This is the same thing... quit posting idiotic words. [] Start your own story/game thread here in the Green Dragon where you can be as silly as you want.

From: Sverige! | Registered: Oct 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Q
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Thingy,
I've posted the words: reptilian and mermaids in A Short Tale before and everyone kept them. Not only that, they rolled with them and created some pretty interesting sentences. This time there's less for you to do by far because my word ends a sentence, and you can't even come up with a word that will start the next one when it doesn't even have to be related to it? What's wrong with the word: passiveness?

Look, if this is going to turn into a thread where a little creativity is treated like crap served on a silver platter then you can keep it all for yourself...if you get my drift. []

[ 12-22-2008, 08:16 AM: Message edited by: Q ]

From: LOS ANGELES, CA. | Registered: Dec 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Thingol of Doriath
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"A little creativity"? [] Randomness isn't creative. [] []

This whole story is supposed to be a group effort. It isn't "Q's story of weird randomness". If everyone else that is partaking complains constantly to you about the words you add... then there is obviously something wrong. It doesn't become a group effort anymore.

If you've noticed in this thread... we've decided to ignore the words you use that don't work in the story. Like your word "feminine" a few posts before. So either you play by the rules:

quote:
The story should make sense. The first version of this RP failed because it became disjointed nonsense. So please, please try and make coherent sentences that further a particular storyline. Don't jump around too much.

Or we ignore your "creative" words and you just become a common troll. []
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Roll of Honor Varnafindë
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Do you know about Theatre Sports?

One possible challenge is
quote:
Paper Chase or Papers: Audience members are asked to write brief sentences on scraps of paper. The improvisers begin a scene, and, at regular intervals, read one of the scraps of paper and work it into the scene. Example: "Doris, I know you're jealous that Uncle Al left me ten million dollars, but [reading] "The moon on the lake makes me think of your thighs."
Our story is not meant to be Q's Theatre Sports challenge to the rest of us. Sometimes we have taken up his challenge after all, and made something usable out of the words he gave us, but that's not what the thread should be. We didn't necessarily roll with his words either, we mostly struggled with them (with 'reptilian' more than with 'mermaids', for some reason).

We sometimes rolled our eyes, though. []

The point of our thread is not to try to make sense of random input, it is to pick up the drift of the story and go along with it. We want constructive input, not randomness.

Q, you have been able to give us such input at times, and that is the only kind of input we're willing to accept from you.

If you think this makes the story too little of a challenge to your creativity, stay out of it and create your own. Or resurrect A Small Saga (not a roaring success, I admit), which you created a couple of years ago.

If you prefer to let us keep A Short Tale all for ourselves, that's fine with me. []

From: Narnia, also connected with Norway | Registered: Dec 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Q
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I don't see what is so "challenging" about the word: passiveness inserted where it was. Or maybe I'm not fitting in with your second grade understanding of word play. They survived on passiveness...it can be done in real life! [] You can avoid trouble or a sword fight by doing nothing, being passive and avoiding confrontation. This is in no way random.

Some of the words I've included may not be critical or essential to moving the story forward because sometimes, like in this sentence below, they make one pause for one gosh darn second and see a new side to the characters:

"Howls could not be produced without considerably dimming hope, but reptilian movements would soon allow almost everyone to appear desperate. Thus they chose not to go the most serpentine path."

I see this as a footnote about their emotions at the moment, a moment which required emotions from the characters in order for the reader to see them as something more than objects going through the motions of translating a text without feeling anything about what they were doing. It tells us that when translating a book of this kind the characters were a little squeamish or nervous, but that no matter how nervous they were they would not allow themselves to be as squeamish as serpents when: "they chose not to go the most serpentine path." This footnote clearly depicts their struggle as what? Human beings! This is similar to when the young lady in the story felt something earlier in the story when she was:

"Staying out of the reach of the barkeepers, she hurried across their path and up towards the group, shaking like a small furry rodent beneath a raptor's talon."

The words rodent and raptor's in this sentence were not mine. Someone else, apparently, decided that a reptilian reference (raptor) was needed...and they weren't blown out of the water for it. The hypocrisy!!! This sentence had nothing to do with moving the story forward because telling the reader how she felt (nervous like a rodent) didn't take us forward...it kept us in the present. This is exactly the kind of thing I did in the sentence
with the word reptile inserted in it. Yet these two sentences were required for us to know how both she and the group were feeling.

[ 12-22-2008, 08:03 PM: Message edited by: Q ]

From: LOS ANGELES, CA. | Registered: Dec 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
LyraLuthien Tinuviel
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Uh, no.
From: GreyHavens via Puget Sound | Registered: Jun 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Thingol of Doriath
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That's funny Lyra- those are the exact words I thought when I read his post.
From: Sverige! | Registered: Oct 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
LyraLuthien Tinuviel
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First, what Q sees as a footnote, most of us see as an impossibly convoluted nightmare that has little if any meaning.

Second, "shaking like a furry rodent" is a perfectly ordinary simile that anyone could understand, and makes sense. Narrowly escaping a brawl with three barmen would naturally cause a lady to tremble in fear. And, as this is not a Lost World story about dinosaurs, "raptor" is not a reptilian reference that doesn't fit; a raptor is a bird of prey. Duh.

The word from the same sentance that doesn't fit, no surprise, was Q's word: group. Up until this post, the lady was travelling alone.

Finally, if your word caused the story to stall for ten days, get a clue. It doesn't fit.

Ignore the troll. Anyone who can think up a word that will fit where Q posted passiveness, should post it so we can go on with the story.

Me personally, I'd rather have a fight scene this time than walk away from another one. [] [] [] Bring it on.

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Inc'
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From: Yoshi's Island | Registered: Apr 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
LyraLuthien Tinuviel
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Thanks, Inc'. Though I wasn't sure what to post after the word "acute," either. []
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Inc'
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Yeah, me neither actually [] []

If it's too complicated, I can change it []

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Roll of Honor Varnafindë
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Good job, Lyra. I didn't know where to start.
You summed it up nicely - both in your first, short post ( [] ) and in the more elaborate one.

From: Narnia, also connected with Norway | Registered: Dec 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Q
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No Lyra, I'm not going to give you the pleasure of a bout. There, the word is changed.

[ 12-24-2008, 07:38 AM: Message edited by: Q ]

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Thingol of Doriath
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There... I added a word. Not great. It was hard to figure out what to end "sense of acute mental..." with. []

But I felt that we had to get past this sentence.

From: Sverige! | Registered: Oct 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Roll of Honor Varnafindë
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Perhaps not great, but a good enough word in my opinion.
Thank you for coming up with it, giving us a chance to go on ...

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Inc'
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Roll of Honor Varnafindë
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Kudos to Inc' for getting this moving again. And I've finally updated the full story.
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Inc'
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Bumped.
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Roll of Honor Varnafindë
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Thank you! []
And I updated to finish the sentence we were in the middle of.

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Inc'
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quote:
The night grew thin and the tension simmered down. When the hands of the clock reached their complete nadir, the sunrise, which now seemed imminent, began to color the eastern wall. When light grew
Okay, that's not the best 3 sentences ever, stylistically (with the repetition of 'grew' and 'when').

But wait... we're not really looking for style in here []

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Inc'
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Double-posting, but... I'm not sure my word is correct here. []
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Roll of Honor Varnafindë
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I'm using it as it is - whether our phrase then is correct or not []
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Inc'
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Sorry, I forgot to copy/paste the story and the link at the beginning of the new page []
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